So, dockermus, you might not be able to polish a turd, but:
There was this old Inuit guy in the far north of Canada whose old shack was being demolished because his life out on the frozen tundra was deemed to be "unsustainable". So he walked outside into the cold, dropped his daks and deposited a turd on his hand. He fashioned it into the shape of a knife, scraped an edge on it once it had frozen solid, killed one of his dogs with it, skinned the dog and made a small sled from its hide and bones, gathered up his other dogs and mushed off into the endless wastes.
True story. Heard it on Radio National from a Canadian something-or-other -igist. Think it's also a metaphor for our 2016 premiership season once every Jonathan Brown and his dog has us dropping out of the four/eight.
Don't polish a turd. Kill a dog with it.
