News_Archives
Dockerland Budget: Melbourne v Fremantle
To save people forking over their hard earned money to the AFL in exchange for a magazine that gets bigger every week, making it harder to get to the only part you actually want - the names of the players, we've introduced the Dockerland Budget.
The Long Wait Is Over
The year was 2010; Mark Harvey was the coach of a team that wore an anchor over a red, green and purple jumper, Facebook was cool, Ben Cousins was a thing, a young Julia Gillard was settling in to The Lodge, people were still prepared to pay money to see Zach Galifianakis in a film and Anthony Morabito was playing AFL Football. They were simpler times in many ways, which is why Fremantle have chosen to take the big bloke up to Darwin to try him out in the country to see how he goes before giving him a run in the city (for some reason Fremantle are playing in Darwin this weekend). Obviously as well as getting Morabito on the park there’s that little issue with no defenders that Fremantle have been grappling with. They’ve had a look around the list and seem to have come up with a bloke by the name of Luke McPharlin, who those in the know reckon goes ok up back. Matt Taberner has mysteriously injured himself and will miss out and Clancee Pearce has been rotated back to Peel.
You Be Ross: Melbourne v Fremantle
Ross Lyon has his sights set on the flag this year but he's the sort of bloke who loves to get feedback from the general public, good or bad. So if you really want to be a true supporter of the club, then make sure you shout stuff out to him at the ground and give him some pointers on how to get this coaching caper done. But before you do your duty as a member and hurl advice in the direction of professional coaching staff, make sure you know what you're talking about or they might just right you off as a nutjob and miss out on some choice advice. Work the board, move the magnets around and when you think you've got it sussed, start practising yelling "Hey Ross! Ross! Put Sandilands in the goal square for a rest!"
Colin Garland |
James Frawley |
Lynden Dunn |
Stephen Hill |
Matthew Pavlich |
Hayden Ballantyne |
Jack Grimes |
Tom McDonald |
Jeremy Howe |
Colin Sylvia |
Chris Mayne |
Cameron Sutcliffe |
Jordie McKenzie |
Bernie Vince |
Jack Viney |
Danyle Pearce |
Ryan Crowley |
David Mundy |
Jack Watts |
Cameron Pedersen |
Matt Jones |
Garrick Ibbotson |
Luke McPharlin |
Tendai Mzungu |
Rohan Bail |
Chris Dawes |
Max Gawn |
Paul Duffield |
Zac Dawson |
Lee Spurr |
Mark Jamar |
Aaron Sandilands |
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Nathan Jones |
Nat Fyfe |
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Dom Tyson |
Nick Suban |
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Dean Terlich |
Dom Barry |
Michael Barlow |
Dean Kent |
Christian Salem |
Lachie Neale |
Daniel Nicholson |
Luke Tapscott |
Zac Clarke |
Alex Georgiou |
Tommy Sheridan |
Anthony Morabito |
Hayden Crozier |
Clancee Pearce |
StasClouds: Fremantle v West Coast
Numbers...you can't trust them. The Romans knew what numbers were up to and wouldn't have a bar of them. You can put your faith in a nice sturdy X but a 10, it's shifty. The only thing more iffy than a number is a statistic, they'll cut you open and rob you of your kidneys before you can say "aren't you supposed to drug me and put in a bath of ice first?". Unfortunately we're hooked on numbers though, we need them to work out how many kicks David Mundy had this week...and probably some other stuff too. The Dockerland Labs spent the summer pondering the problem and eventually, when the cricket was over, the fridge was empty and the clicker broke in everyone's pen, they came up with a solution - the stats cloud. A quick glance and you'll pretty much know everything about a game of football that there was to know, at least all the boring bits about it. The bigger the player's name, the more kicks, or marks, or tackles he had compared to his teammates.Â