The Swans had finished on the top
and Fremantle had come fourth
So they played the final in Sydney
It's like Melbourne, but further north 

The plane was late, the rain came early
the ground was a funny shape.
but Pav called out 'It's wharfie time'
and donned his superman cape

Sydney went on the front foot early
but they just couldn't find the big sticks
Back home in Freo the fans were toey
and Basil Zempilas was giving them the shits

Mzungu broke through for the purple team
and then Pavlich steadied the ship
Ballantyne wasn't getting much footy
but he still gave out plenty of lip

By quarter time it was three goals each
With the Swans ahead on points
But Sydney were down a defender
Malceski had buggered one of his joints

They siren sounded, it was on again
and Fremantle came out firing
Pavlich put the Freo team in front
as always, the captain was inspiring

The Swans weren't ones to lay down
to roll over or to fold
They looked around and thought about 
When Cathy Freeman won the gold

Then they dobbed a couple in reply
then doubled their defence
no one scored for twenty minutes
by golly it was tense

The half time break was coming
A welcome break indeed
But there was time for Pav to goal
To put Freo a kick within the lead

Half time in the changeroom
saw the coaches do their best
to give their teams a rev up
and the boys to have a rest

The break didn't last forever
And the players headed back
It's the golden minute of the game
Where Barlow isn't showing any crack

The ball went straight to Ballantyne
Who was having a quiet day
But the kick it was a scrubber
And Ross gave him an almighty spray 

It was hard to hear what the coach said
When Ballas failed to put his team in front
Ross must have thought he dropped his head
because it sounded like 'you ducking runt'

Things took a bad turn after that
And Freo barely kicked a score
What made matters much, much worse
Sydney's goal count totalled four

There were no last minute Pavlich soccers
No signs of Zac'ry Dawson's hands of glue
To salvage the third quarter scoreline
Where the Swans lead by twenty two

It all came down to the last quarter
Fremantle needed to show some grit
Two minutes in they had two goals
Good God! They were going to win it.

Now Silvangi had been keeping
Franklin quiet as a mouse
He'd scragged, he bumped, he'd sheparded 
He’d made Buddy look like a girls blouse

But then Franklin got a shot on goal
After Scos had kept him in a blanket
Silvagni just closed his eyes 
and said 'Please God let him shank it'

But Buddy kicked it straight and true
No sign of the Buddy arc
Silvagni took a deep breath in
then shouted an almighty "fark'

From there it was too tough a job
To reel the Swans back in
They'd have to go the long way round
if the premiership they were to win

So off the ground they trotted
To Sydney they had succumbed
A no excuses football club
(although those umpires were all bums)

And Ross will get them back on track
with a quote from Sun Tzu
and thank God I've finally found a
rhyme for Tendai Mzungu